


That 'Back to School' Feeling

by 0Rocky41_7



Series: I Guess This is Happening: Theodora Hawke [4]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age II
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, College, F/F, Gen, Modern Era, Modern Thedas, Purple Hawke (Dragon Age), Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-20
Updated: 2019-12-20
Packaged: 2021-02-26 04:01:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,241
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21867190
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/0Rocky41_7/pseuds/0Rocky41_7
Summary: Prompt: Merrill starts her first year of college full of excitement. After moving into her dorm she decides to explore and heads out for a walk. No more than five minutes later a football is slamming into her face at top speed, it’s dark, and then she’s waking up in the arms of a stranger with blood running down her chin and onto her blouse.
Relationships: Female Hawke/Merrill, Hawke/Merrill
Series: I Guess This is Happening: Theodora Hawke [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2111598
Comments: 2
Kudos: 22





	That 'Back to School' Feeling

**Author's Note:**

> Poor Merrill. This is a prompt from the dapromptexchange
> 
> See more about Hawke on her [tumblr tag.](https://imakemywings.tumblr.com/tagged/theodora%20hawke)
> 
> Got some Merhawke vibes [here](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1EIy0nHHuyg).

To the left. No, a bit more to the right. Too far—that was definitely over the dividing line of the room. Back to the left. Or maybe it should go by the door? No, no—that would make the door too hard to open. Squeezed between her summer camp-esque bed and the wooden armoire, whose walls were almost certainly hollow, and in the door of which she had found someone’s initials (presumably) carved? Not enough room, most likely. Perhaps just twisted a bit there to the right.

Merrill stepped back to admire her handiwork. All her things were neatly arranged on her half of the room—she had made sure that nothing hung over the center line of the room, where it might disturb her roommate. A roommate who had yet to arrive, but Merrill would hate for her first impression to be of thoughtlessness. Satisfied with her arrangement, she dropped the hand rubbing her chin and twirled around in the center of the room. It was barely large enough to allow for such movement, even with half of it unoccupied, but the tight quarters couldn’t dampen Merrill’s enthusiasm with their best efforts at feeling like a hamster cage. Her own dorm room! Shared, but still! Half hers! At the window, she could see a stretch of lovingly tended grass and some late-blooming fall flowers lining the walkway up to the dormitory. Thoughtful of them, to think of including some nature in what was otherwise a maze of concrete and brick. She was there, at last!

A giggle escaped, relieved and giddy and nervous, and she threw herself down on her bed, punching the air out of the thin, plastic-coated mattress with even her inconsequential weight, and immediately sinking down to the wobbly iron frame. She took no more notice of the discomfort than she would have of a buzzing fly. What did it matter, if the furniture was poorly made? She was at _university._

The thoughts and feelings rushed around inside her mind, stymying any chance for sitting still. Merrill bounced up off her bed and reached for her sandals. Why sit around when there was the whole campus to explore? She had never gotten to do a tour, so this was her chance. And it certainly couldn’t hurt to get the lay of the land before classes started! A messenger bag, worn leather and sewn-on patches, hung at Merrill’s hip as she let herself out of the room. Down the hall, other students were moving themselves in, staggering around with boxes, suitcases, and furniture, often accompanied by chattery friends or anxious family members. The excitement was infectious, even as Merrill felt a pang of longing for home. No one had been able to spare the time or money to fly all the way out to help her move in, but it would have been nice to walk around campus with someone—to share her excitement. Naturally, her mind went straight to Tamlen, pulsing an old and familiar ache through her breast. What an adventure he would have found this!

Oh, but it was no matter that she was alone now—she’d make friends soon! Hopefully that would be easier here than back home.

Outside, the air was cool, not yet descended into fall crispness. The sun was on its way down, sapping the last of the late-summer heat that had pervaded the day, and the lamps around campus were lighting up to guide bewildered freshmen and battle-scarred seniors along its stone pathways. A moment of indecision pinned Merrill to the ground outside her dormitory, looking left and right before swinging right. Abruptly, she changed her mind, turned, and went the other way. Then, she wondered why she had done such a foolish thing, but committed herself to the current direction.

University! She could _learn_ here, really learn! Keeper Marethari had taught Merrill all she could, but there was only so much the old keeper could impart on her. The insularity of Dalish communities and the struggle to recall much of their history had frustrated Merrill’s ambitions for years. To think she had finally been loosed in a library where she might find answers, might find solutions, was intoxicating. She couldn’t stop the goofy smile from returning to her face over and over again. If anyone thought anything odd about the Dalish elf wandering around smiling to herself, they didn’t say so.

The very air tasted of opportunity, and as alarming as it was to be in a strange place full of _shemlen_ with none of her clan about, Merrill hadn’t an iota of regret for the decision. It was where she needed to be, she was certain. Walking through campus in the dim light of early evening with her mind wrapped up in these thoughts, Merrill did not see the other students until a bellow of “Hey!” made her look up, just in time to see the ball before it clocked her directly in the face.

_Well that was unfortunate_ , she thought before hitting the ground.

***

“Fuck. She’s out. Fuck!” A woman’s voice.

“This…is not good.” A man? “You dipshit, look what you did!”

“It’s _dark_ , and she’s wearing _black!”_ Another voice, lower than the second. “Does that look like a lot of blood to you?”

“That’s green. And aren’t elves supposed to see better in the dark than humans?” What came next was more like a _growl_ —an animal? Where was she? Creators, she hadn’t gotten lost in the woods, had she?

“Hey. Hey, lady.” Someone—the woman?— gave Merrill a little shake. “Hey, would you two shut the fuck up? We need to get her to a nurse.” Something rubbed against her chin, but Merrill was too disoriented to place the texture of it.

“Hawke’s right.” The squabbling went on, and Merrill pried her eyes open, finally pulling back to the realm of the living. Her eyes opened directly into deep pools of amber—or maybe cinnamon was more accurate? Or the color of a tanned halla hide left out in the sun for a few summers? The _shemlen_ ’s round face was framed with glossy black hair, and Merrill’s dazed attention passed from her concerned gaze to the swooping bridge of her nose, to her lips, parted to say…something.

“Wow, you’re pretty.” Merrill was only half-aware of the mumbling coming out of her mouth, but that wasn’t entirely unusual. The furrowed brow of the _shemlen_ leaning over her smoothed in surprise, then her look turned dire. Merrill began pushing herself upright, briefly halted by the stunning ache in her head.

“Maker, she’s delirious.”

“She must be,” said the low-voiced person.

“Hey!” The _shemlen’_ s attention snapped to the side briefly, but returned then to Merrill. “I’m so sorry.” With the edge of her jacket, she wiped at Merrill’s nose, at which point Merrill became aware of the wetness. Was all that blood? Had she been trying to wipe blood of Merrill’s face before?

“Sorry, that was the wrong thing to say,” Merrill said. Looking down, she saw her shirt was darkly spotted, and she lifted a hand to her nose. _Ow_! _Fenedhis lasa_ , that hurt!

“We are so sorry,” the _shemlen_ emphasized again. “Fenris wasn’t _looking_ where he was throwing the damn ball.”

“ _You_ were supposed to catch it, _Hawke_ ,” said the low-voiced one, Fenris. When Merrill glanced over, she was surprised to see he was not _shemlen_ , but an elf, with the strangest tattoos she’d ever seen. No _vallaslin_ she was familiar with!

“Then try aiming somewhere in the square _mile_ around me next time,” said Hawke. Shaking her head, she vigorously reapplied her attention to Merrill, and not to the bickering of her companions. “Are you okay? We’ll get you to the nurse so someone can look at your nose. It doesn’t _look_ broken.” It was bleeding quite a bit though, judging by the stickiness on her mouth and chin, and the irregular polka-dot pattern on her shirt. Merrill swiped clumsily at her face, succeeding in smearing it across her chin and jaw. It was a _wonder_ boys and girls didn’t swoon at her feet!

“Oh, I’m fine,” Merrill went on babbling. “I’ll just…” She grabbed Hawke’s shoulders and used the _shemlen_ to stagger to her feet. “Just need to…”

“I don’t think she can walk,” said the softer-voiced one, another _shemlen_.

“Fuck. You don’t think she has a concussion, do you?” Hawke asked.

“Not at all!” Merrill told them, taking several long seconds to become aware she had not said this out loud.

“Right. To the nurse.” Hawke looked again to Merrill. “We’re going to get you to the nurse, okay? Is anyone expecting you?” Merrill laughed dizzily, swaying on her feet and giving Hawke a feeble punch in the shoulder, as she’d seen some _shemlen_ do before to indicate jocular friendship.

“Expecting me! No one expects me!” The ground was starting to feel sure beneath her feet again. But her thoughts were so consumed with running her fingers through the silky-looking hair of the woman in front of her that she couldn’t be entirely sure she _wasn’t_ concussed. “Maybe I should talk to the nurse.”

“I’ll carry you,” Hawke said. “Fenris, help me get her up.”

“Oh no, you don’t have to—” Her feet were off the ground before she finished, as the other elf hoisted her onto Hawke’s back. “Wow, you guys are strong.” She locked her arms around Hawke’s neck as the woman adjusted her grip, and made no protests that she could, in fact, walk on her own. “Do you play sports? You’re very…muscly.” It was easy to feel pressed against Hawke’s back with her legs wrapped around her waist.

“I think you have an admirer,” said the other human. Merrill tilted her head up to get a look at him. A sharp nose dominated his profile and his fair hair looked like birds had been nesting in it recently.

“She’s just concussed,” Fenris said. He hesitated for an uncomfortable moment and then added, “I’m sorry about your face.”

“Oh, it’s okay,” Merrill said. “You didn’t mean it.” Fenris and the tall human looked at her as if she were an alien, a look she was somewhat used to from the Sabrae, and which she would become very familiar with on campus. Was there some _shemlen_ insult she didn’t know of to being hit in the face with a ball? “Should I be offended? I haven’t been here very long.”

“I mean, most people would be a bit more pissed off about it,” Hawke said. “Good on you for the optimism, though.” Merrill’s grip around Hawke’s neck tightened just a bit, and she ducked her head, surreptitiously breathing in the faint odor of grass and sweat layered over Hawke’s hair and the back of her neck. The smell of it was sweet in a way that made Merrill want to bury her face in the woman’s hair, but she had enough wits to refrain from that at least. For now. “How are you feeling?”

“My head hurts quite a bit,” Merrill admitted. “And my nose…Does my voice sound funny?”

“A bit, yes,” said the tall one. A sigh blew past Merrill’s lips. She could just imagine what the _hahrens_ would say. There goes Merrill, not watching where she’s going again.

“I should have been paying more attention,” she lamented.

“Maybe, but so should we,” Hawke replied. Merrill nodded along with that, before being promptly overcome with a sense of panic. Jerking back from Hawke, she twisted around to the direction they had come from.

“My bag!” she cried. “Oh, it had my room key in it!” Hawke grunted at the sudden motion, automatically turning with the movement of the elf on her back, her hands grasping at Merrill’s legs to keep them steady.

“You mean the one right there?” Fenris asked, pointing to Merrill’s bag, which had not budged from its place at her hip.

“Oh! Yes. That one. Sorry.” A few pats assured her it was there, and freed her mind to be aware of Hawke’s hands on her. “So, um, are you all freshmen too?” Perhaps she could distract them from her mistake with conversation. A mixture of snorts and laughter made her think that was not the case.

“First week and you’re already getting injured? Rough start,” Hawke said. “The nurse is in Theirin Hall, isn’t it? I’ve never been. Anders, do you know?”

“It’s in Theirin Hall,” confirmed the tall one. “First floor.” Hawke hefted Merrill up the front steps with admirable effort—Merrill nearly choking her with over concerns they might just tip over backwards—and set her down to explain to the nurse what had happened—she left out the bit where she and her friends were responsible for the ball making such a violent acquaintance with Merrill’s face, but Merrill didn’t volunteer the information. The nurse ran her through a few tests, gave her plenty of water, and prescribed bedrest.

“Given that you lost consciousness, I would also advise you stay home from class for the next few days,” he added, passing her a trash can for the bloody paper towels she had used to clean her face up. “You can email your professors to let them know what happened, I’ll provide a note if you need it.”

“No class?” Merrill asked, her mouth dropping open with the same crushing dismay that widened her eyes and wrinkled her brow. Something about the disproportionate sense of despair on her face made the nurse laugh.

“Most students would be overjoyed,” he said. “I’ve just told you to skip class and lay around in bed!”

“It was going to be my first day,” she lamented, her shoulders slumping. Not even the first day, and she’d already messed it up. How would she catch up if she had to miss the first week of class? She’d be off for the rest of the semester! What a terrible beginning!

“I’m sorry about that,” the nurse told her. “But if you give it a few days and you don’t have any more dizziness, confusion, or nausea, you can go right ahead. Is one of your friends there your roommate? It will be best to have someone with you, especially for the first 24 hours.”

“Oh, they’re not my friends,” Merrill said. “We just met. My roommate hasn’t come in yet.”

“I see. Good of them to bring you in, then. Well, try to find one of your friends on campus to hang out for a while then,” he said. “And if you’re having vertigo or amnesia, come back here and we’ll take another look.” He released her into the hallway, which appeared to have been originally laminated some thirty years ago, where she was surprised to see Hawke, Fenris, and Anders hanging around one of the rigid wooden benches. Hawke and Anders were either arguing about something, or simply having a very passionate discussion.

“I can’t believe you even waste your time with that show,” Fenris concluded as Hawke and Anders were cut off by Merrill’s appearance. The nurse thanked them heartily for being such upstanding citizens by bringing a total stranger and newcomer to campus in for care (still no one offered up that they had concussed her themselves) and assured them she would be okay before receding back into his office in the manner of all staff who don’t exist outside their workspace.

“What’s the full prognosis?” Hawke asked, causing Merrill’s head to tilt in confusion. “What did the nurse say?” She shook her head, making her bangs dance enchantingly across her forehead.

“Oh! Rest, and if I start forgetting things, to come back.”

“Was it that bad?”

“She did lose consciousness,” Anders pointed out, leaning back against the windowsill. The coat he was wearing had either been passed down through at least three generations of wearers, or perhaps it actually _was_ made of feathers, which explained why it appeared to be molting. “That’s grade 3 by most standards.”

“It was only for a couple seconds.” Merrill supposed the defensiveness in Fenris’ tone came from guilt. He did not look at her.

“It doesn’t matter,” Anders replied testily. “Loss of conscious _at all_ is grade 3.”

“He also said I’m not supposed to be alone, but my roommate hasn’t come in yet,” Merrill added with a frown, biting her lip. “At least, she hadn’t when I last looked.” Hawke looked over at Anders.

“Well…since we did concuss you, I guess you better come with us, huh? We were going to get pizza. Celebrate our last night before the work starts.” She flashed a grin that made a shiver roll up Merrill’s spine, sporting something terrifyingly _wolfish_ in the flash of her teeth and the gleam of her eyes. It was a look that reminded Merrill of stepping off the stairs thinking there was one more stair than there was; it reminded of her of the tales of the trickster, Fen’harel. “You want to come?”

“Out to dinner? Oh, _yes!_ ” She was _right_ , making friends here was _so_ much easier than back home with the Sabrae! “I mean, I don’t have much money, but yes! Yes, I would love to! Thank you!” Hawke grinned again, only mildly less sublimely, and rose from her seat.

“Great! You okay to walk?”

“Oh yes, I am. I mean, I was before. Oh, I suppose I should have said. You did a very good job carrying me though.” Fenris snorted and Anders snickered.

“Carried her all the way up here for nothing,” Fenris said.

“I should have made _you_ do it!” Hawke slammed the heel of her hand into Fenris’ shoulder, but he barely budged. For an elf, he was quite solidly built. And Hawke wasn’t very large. “Not that you weigh much,” she added, eyeing Merrill’s slight elven frame. Perhaps Merrill should have said she wasn’t feeling up to walking.

“Come on, let’s go before we starve to death,” Anders said, striding by the other two down the hall.

“It’s not our fault you forget half your meals!” But Hawke followed after, waving Merrill along. “I don’t think I ever got your name, girl we accidentally gave a concussion,” she said to Merrill.

“No, I suppose you didn’t. It’s Merrill,” she said.

“Good to meet you, Merrill,” Hawke said, flashing a smile that squeezed the air out of Merrill’s lungs in a way that was far less alarming than she might have expected from reading a description of the sensation. “I’m Hawke, and these two dunderheads are Fenris and Anders.” A slightly nervous giggle came from Merrill. _Shemlen_ had passed through the Sabrae settlement—she had seen them before, and there had been some mixed-blood kids in her classes growing up—but this was already a more in-depth interaction than she’d ever had with humans before.

“It’s nice to meet you all.”

“Welcome to school,” Hawke said grandly as they threw open the doors of Theirin Hall to trot out into the cool fall air. “Hope you’re excited!” Merrill fixed her starry-eyed gaze on the gesticulating woman beside her, bedazzled by the slight hoarseness the came naturally to Hawke’s voice and the easy smiles that twisted her mouth, with a look like she had understood the wryness of the world since birth. She was saying something else now, but it was not registering at all with Merrill’s enraptured brain.

“Oh, you have no idea.”

**Author's Note:**

> [On tumblr](https://imakemywings.tumblr.com/post/189765980415/merrill-starts-her-first-year-of-college-full-of)| [On Pillowfort](https://www.pillowfort.social/posts/987987)
> 
> If you liked this, you might like...  
> \- [The Rain, it Raineth Every Day](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24808600) by allisonlivesinwonderland  
> \- [between the shadow and the soul](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27598331) by sarsaparillia


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